(I know that’s a completely unoriginal way to start a post)
It’s that time where I begin packing up my clothes and other necessary items for the somewhat long journey ahead of me.
Four dresses, two pants, five shirts, flashlight, etc...etc.
I feel like I am going to camp once again.
Where am I going you ask?
Well, read on and you’ll find out.
___
The ending of my spring semester at Agnes Scott left me feeling hopeless, as I had been, once again, rejected from another national scholarship to fund me in study abroad.
The study abroad program (SIT) I was hoping to go through is expensive (what educational program isn’t?) and without one of the national scholarships I had little hope to study through that program.
For three months I believed that, after all the work I put into applying to the program and various scholarships, that it really was for nothing.
It made me feel crummy.
Then I moved into a Christian Fraternity at Georgia Tech.
I know, I know. It speaks for itself.
I had two amazing jobs lined up for me.
Then those two fell through.
“The economy is in a recession.”
That also made me feel crummy.
I lost a lot of confidence in myself as I realized that I am not as financially independent as much as I wish I was. I wanted to be independent and prove that I could take care of myself.
To build myself back up, I attempted to intern/volunteer again at the International Rescue Committee but I felt like I received less attention (more interns) and was given simple tasks.
I was attempting to find jobs for refugees when I, myself lacked one.
So I decided that the more economic thing would be to save gas and come back in the winter.
Meanwhile, I would try to find something to do back at Georgia Tech.
But, there was nothing to do.
There were no jobs that I could find.
I was not taking any classes.
I didn’t know the area or the people on campus.
I was just wandering around, wondering how I could pass the time.
For four months….
And as time carried on, so did I.
My days lacked structure.
I became nocturnal.
And I met many, many people.
But through that time, I feel like I have never personally grown so much.
I had more time to think about how situations were changing me.
And why certain things kept reappearing while other things disappeared.
I was able to reflect and be honest with myself.
I was able to draw and read and do all the things that I complained that I NEVER had time for during the academic year.
I didn’t know the area or the people on campus.
I was just wandering around, wondering how I could pass the time.
For four months….
And as time carried on, so did I.
My days lacked structure.
I became nocturnal.
And I met many, many people.
But through that time, I feel like I have never personally grown so much.
I had more time to think about how situations were changing me.
And why certain things kept reappearing while other things disappeared.
I was able to reflect and be honest with myself.
I was able to draw and read and do all the things that I complained that I NEVER had time for during the academic year.
But during one of these days when I was frustrated from various things, an amazing thing happened that made me believe that once again, life was willing to pick me up.
I received my financial scholarship from SIT.
It unfortunately wasn’t enough.
So I wrote to SIT explaining that I would be withdrawing from the study-abroad program for financial reasons.
Immediately I received a response from a very friendly man in the office who asked what my financial situation was.
I wrote to him what I could afford and he wrote back offering me much, much more in financial aid.
I was happy.
That’s when I realized that I was meant to study abroad in Tunisia.
It was fate!
So, September 1st I will head off to Tunisia.
“Tanzania?”
“No, Tunisia.”
“New Zealand?”
“It’s below Italy and next to Algeria.”
“Trinidad?”
I think most people think I am heading off to a different continent.That’s okay though.
They just know I’m somewhere new, learning how to, once again, live outside my comfort zone.
I don’t know Arabic or French, but I’m sure that through the months I will slowly learn them.
Learning languages takes time and dedication and a lot of practice.
After my experience when living with an infant (in my host family) in Ecuador, learning a language comes in stages.
First you learn to listen, then you learn to speak.
Patience and a lot of it.
I don’t know the culture that well either.
It’s a hodgepodge of cultures, an infusion.
It was once an ancient ship route.
It’s the wealthiest country in Africa and the second wealthiest country throughout the Middle East.
I also don’t know anyone there.
But from my experience people are always interested in meeting you and introducing you to their culture.
Once you step off the plane into a foreign city, the streets and building all seem to be foreign and overwhelming.
But what truly makes you attached to a city is the local people you meet.
Once you leave, the only comfort is saying that you will return one day.
Maybe you will, maybe you will not.
___
So here I am again, wondering what this new stage in my life may be.
I have been trying my hardest to live in the moment, so that I will not create some sort of mental image of where I will be going and what events I will encounter.
As we all know, our imaginations are far from reality.
It’ll be a mystery.
Through the four months, I may change a lot.
I may change a little.
I guess we’ll just have to see.
Until then,
Ma' Alsalam
Au revior
lovely...........
ReplyDeleteBON VOYAGE DEAR ONE!
ReplyDeleteMaggie! I wish I read this months ago!
ReplyDelete-Alanna